As you can see, I’m not here to tell you about a book I’ve read or a con I’ve attended. Little Images has very little (if anything) to do with horror writing. Quite the opposite actually. 😉
Little Images is a home based business, run by my friend Charlie Vaughn. They offer personalized caricatures and drawings for all sorts of things, kid-related and not.
Here’s what Little Images has to say about themselves:
“Fed up with boring and unimaginative children’s bedrooms? On a budget and can’t afford to fully redecorate? Want to make your children’s bedroom or playroom more exciting, colourful and imaginative?
For canvasses, blinds, toy boxes and units we give you an estimate on the measurements/materials and then £10 booking fee and £10 per hour on the job itself.
Please like and share with your help we can bring more smiles.
It’s like we keep saying with “LITTLE IMAGES” comes big visions!
These will lead to the biggest and richest smiles you can get!
Thanks for your time.
Maybe I’m just a big kid at heart, but I thin you should at least give their FB page a look-see and check out what they offer.
I’m a little late with this post, but I figured better late than never. Besides, with a memory like mine, it’s not that easy to figure out what I’ve done and when. I suppose I could just scroll through my blog to see what’s happened, but I figured I’d try to reminice on my own.
This past year has been a whirlwind of events I never thought possible. (Most of it thanks to the story, She Makes Me Smile. On that note, I’ve reread SMMS recently, and I have already noticed my growth as a writer. It’s not that I don’t like SMMS, I still really do, but there is a lot more editing I’d throw in there, if I have a chance to “redo” it one day.) Anyways, aside from me using the words “just” and “that” way less when I write, 2012 has also been a monumental year for many other reasons.
First of all, in 2012 I’ve added tons of new friends into my life. Not just friends, but a support group of peers who understand what being a writer is like. My Facebook friends list has expanded exponentially (which could be seen as a problem as well, since FB is my main way to procrastinate from writing. I talk WAY too much for my own good.)
I won’t even attempt to mention the people I’ve met, since I’ve added nearly 700 people onto my FB page, but you know who you are.
To all those I’ve met this year, or knew before, thanks for coming into my life. I appreciate your friendship for sure. *Hugs*
On top of adding to my friends list on FB, I’ve had the chance to attend my first conventions as an author. I was lucky enough to attend Horrorfind 14, KillerCon 5 and Anthocon 2. Conventions are awesome, they allow me to put a face to a name for those who I may have only known online before. I think attending conventions could possible rank up there as one of my most favourite things in the world. And not only cause I can drink my face off and I’m not the only one who is doing it. (Although it does help a lot.)
*Insert random anthem here* I pledge allegiance to the Bucket Of Vodka Gummies!
Between readings and panels, conventions have solidified my love for being in front of a crowd. Not that I really needed the reassurance, but I’m glad I had the chance to do this and look forward to many more in 2013.
I sold my first book at a con this year, actually on that note, I sold my first everything this year and that make’s me smile. (Sorry, haha, I had to put that in somewhere… :P)
The one thing I didn’t get done in 2012 was to complete a novel. I suppose I can’t have everything the first year, but it would’ve been nice. *Shrug* I suppose this gives me something to strive for in 2013. I do have a few on the go (don’t we all). I’ve been working on a zombie novel, a collection of erotiporn stories, a slew of novellas and a crapload of short stories. (I’m all over the freaking map, but I like it that way.)
One of my goals this year is to not be so procrastinatey when it comes to writing, but then again it did take me 12 days into the new year to get this blog posted…
In 2012, I was a horror writer, but this might change in 2013. I’ve noticed my some of my stories have been taking on a bizarro-esque theme, much more than horror these days. My editor calls these stories bizarro-light. Between horror and bizarro, I also write smut or erotiporn. Well that’s what I call it, if my bizarro is “bizarro-light” then my smut is “erotica-hard”. I’ve blended the sex with horror, which gave me the genre I coined “horrotica”. Yes I like to make up my own words and genres. I think for 2013 I’m just going to keep writing what my head wants to write, it seems to have worked for 2012.
In conclusion, 2012 was
good great amazing! I want to thank all the people who’ve been there for me all along like my friends and family. You’ve all put up with my insanity and I wouldn’t be the person I am now if it wasn’t for the people I have around me. It’s been a crazy ride in life, but I’m so happy to have you all as passengers. I love you guys.
Now I’m just getting sappy, so this is where I’ll end it.
Best wishes to everyone in 2013.
Hope to meet you if we haven’t crossed paths yet and to those I have met, let’s meet again.
I’ll bring the gummy worms. 😉
I was asked by fellow Canadian author Bruce Blake to take part in the ongoing bloggery that is The Next Big Thing. It’s a chance for us to tell people about what we’ve got going on at the moment in our world of writing and then we tag five other authors to do the same. Bruce wrote about his next big thing last week and you can find that here.
This is the first time I’ve ever heard of The Next Big Thing, but I love to be part of something so, of course, I said yes.
Every author involved had to answer the same ten questions regarding their current work in progress.
My WIP is, at the moment, is sitting with editor #2. It passed through editor #1 with flying colours and not as many mistakes as I thought there would be.
Enough with my rambling, here’s what my next big thing is…
What is the working title of your book?
It’s not the working title, I can guarantee it is the title.
(Pretty sure I started with the title and decided to write a novella to go with it.)
Title is (drum roll please): YAMMAGEDDON!!!
Where did the idea come from for the book?
It’s all about my pet sweet potato, Yammy. I was supposed to eat him for lunch one day, but he looked “musey” to me so I put him on my desk and the story just started to happen. I guess that would be proof enough of his musey-ness.
What genre does your book fall under?
I suppose it would be Bizarro, but part of me doesn’t think YAMMAGEDDON!!! is that weird. (Maybe I’m just too desensitized to things…) It does have elements of horror and science fiction as well, so for now I’m going to call it speculative fiction and that should cover everything.
Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition?
The characters are all based off real people; I didn’t change anything, I even left their names the same. Oh, except for one, I did have to make up one of the characters. I’d love to have the real people in the movie, but if I had to hazard a guess, Kristen Ritter should play Mandy. Selma Hayek would make a good Tasha, (if she can master a Canadian accent). Ewan McGregor for Brian (Canadian accent required once again) and Norman Reedus could play Nate. Mr. PotatoHead would have to be Yammy. I have no other ideas to who else could play the part of the sweet potato.
What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book?
YAMMAGEDDON!!! is a heartwarming story about a girl and her sweet potato, until everything starts to go wrong.
Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?
I’m hoping someone will pick it up, but if not, I will put it out on my own. This story NEEDS to be read by everyone!
How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?
I started it a few months ago, worked on it for about a week, then it sat for a bit when life got in the way. I finally decided to finish it one day and I wrote the rest in less than a week. All together approximately two weeks.
What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?
Ummm, really? I don’t think there are books that compare to this one. I haven’t read a lot of bizarro stories yet, so they might be out there. However as of now, shrug, it’s a one of a kind.
Who or What inspired you to write this book?
It’s all Yammy the Wonder Spud. He’s the inspiration.
What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?
I can guarantee they’ve never read anything like this before. For those who are looking for advance sweet potato entertainment, feel free to follow THE YAMMAGEDDON Facebook Page or YAMMY’s Twitter account.*(Yammy’s learned how to use the Internet, we’re all in trouble now.)
(I feel the need to add the point that Yammy sounds like Morbo from Futurama.)
Now I get to tag five more people to do the same thing I just did.
Here are my victims:
Thanks for Reading 😀
It’s been a week and a day since Dickie, Daley and I made our way across the border to the land of all that was to be Anthocon. Having the three of us in the car at the same time was an unnerving experience once we got to the border, but luckily we made it across with no cavity searches. I’m sure someone in the car was upset about the lack of invasiveness at the border, but I’m not naming names. We continued our way through tiny little states, crossing through more snow than we have in Canada. Leave it to us to find snow 6 hours south of Ontario.
Daley made me excessively happy by bringing his Darth Vader GPS with him. Hearing Darth say “roundabout”—or anything else for that matter—lead the three of us into incessant fits of laughter.
We stopped along the way to pick up Michele and then made our way to the Holiday Inn in Portsmouth, NH.
SO EXCITED, when we noticed there was a giant booze store across from the hotel. We checked in, dumped our bags and the four of us made our way across the street to alcohol heaven.
SO SAD, as we walked through the giant liquor store and realized booze and beer weren’t sold in the same places in NH. Back across the street, empty handed and to the car, as Dickie, Daley and DeGeit decided there must be beer.
SO ELATED, as we stepped into the grocery store, also known as beer heaven to us Canadians. The prices of beer here in NH are enough to send my liver into an ecstatic seizure. Thirty beer for 14$? Yup, I think I’m moving here…
We loaded up a cart—like really loaded up a cart—I think between the four of us we clocked in at 96 cans of beer. (Cause that’s how Canadians roll) and made our way back to the hotel.
Thursday night, Danny gathered the forces and took us to this fantastic little pub called The Coat Of Arms. They had deals on pints, great food and gave us free beer/shwag. You can’t go wrong with free beer/shwag.
Back at the hotel, there was more beer, hanging with the early peeps and there were also worms.
Friday morning rolls around and I already have a beer in my hand. (Big surprise.) I figured it was a good time to ingest some of this crazy cheap beer, and ingest I did.
By Friday night, the vodka soaked gummy worms were out to play.
“…and she carried with her a bucket of liquid diabetes and liver disease.”
We were all in the bar/lounge and I was passing those worms out quicker than a whore passes out STDs. From table to table, I made everyone ingest all that was bad in my bucket.
There was a moment when I thought I might lose the worms. The older lady from the bar came up to me to inquire if there was booze in my bucket. I replied with a shit-eating grin on my face, “No booze. Phsst, just worms floating in water.” I must have a trustworthy face, because she bought it.
Now something to understand about the worms, I’ve been making these for a long, long time. The rule is, the drunkest person in the room gets the worm shmoo, cause they are most likely the ones to drink the grossly gelatinous, sugar saturated, liquor leftover from the bucket.
One guess on who drank the shmoo? 😀
Fast-forward through clamslaps, neener neeners and me just being my hilariously drunk self and I finally made it to bed, unsure of the time.
I was smart and set four alarms, as I was to be on the Pitfalls of New Authors panel in the morning.
I was dumb and turned them all off, only to wake up five minutes before my panel. I was a hurting unit as I ran into the room where they were all waiting for me. But at least I made it.
“Mandy, what’s one piece of advice you want to tell new authors?”
“NEVER. EVER. Drink the worm shmoo.”
It was a great panel, as I pushed away the constant pounding in my head and nursed the beer I grabbed as I was getting ready.
(What the hell is wrong with me? Oh I’m Canadian.)
The rest of Saturday was a blur for two reasons, one I was hungover from the previous night, two, because I kept drinking.
Come on liver, deliver.
Sunday morning, I was a little more “right of mind” and took the opportunity to head to a few panels. I was audience to the Art in Fiction panel and the Publishing panel which were both followed by more drinking.
Sadly, Sunday also meant people had to leave. There were a lot of hugs and goodbyes and plans were made for the Dead Dog party, which I was definitely hanging around for.
Thirteen of the stragglers (diehard drinkers) made their way to the Portsmouth Brewery for dinner. We took over a giant table, fed our faces and drank some expensive beer before heading back to the hotel to put a hurt on the rest of the leftover booze.
The final party was the most epic, but that could be because it’s one of the only ones where I remember pretty much all of it.
However, there were parts I would love to have brain bleach for…
There was a singing dinosaur, a lot of laughs, and the poop song. (The song stemmed from a conversation between Dickie, Daley and I on the way down. I won’t go into details, but yeah… There was a poop song.)
We drew things on wood, took terrible pictures and drank as much as we possibly could, before retiring one by one, or some by some to our rooms.
Monday, I left. It made me sad, but I knew that I would return next year.
Next time I bring a video camera.
With the end of the year drawing close and all the stories I have out and about in PublishLand, I’ve taken it upon myself to get some more writing done.
I don’t take handwritten notes anymore, my phone had become the place where I jot down all the ideas I have.
As I was flipping through the notes I’ve taken over the past months, I had an idea.
Just get them done.
25 Short Stories, (plus the novella I’m working on at the moment), at least to completion of a rough draft, by New Year’s Eve.
Sounds doable right?
Yeah, it’s a pretty daunting goal, but even if I get half of my list done, there’s 13 more stories and a novella I didn’t have before.
I’m not aiming for half though.
I want to get ALL the ideas off my phone and onto paper, so I can start all over again next year. 😉
I’ll keep up the tally on the blog to let you know where I’m at.
1 of 25 Stories
(Well the 1 is that I’ve started one but it’s not done yet…)
Novella @ 50%
Here we go.
Sometimes I worry about how I come across to other people. I can be loud, or possibly bordering on annoying. I try to make people laugh, but I might just come off as being an asshat. I love meeting new people and HOPEFULLY, they love meeting me… But you never really know.
UNLESS, someone posts a blog post like this one. 😀
Thanks to Guy Anthony De Marco for the awesome write up.
It quells my fears a little.
THEY LIKE ME, THEY REALLY LIKE ME!!!
(Well, at least one person does, hehe.) 🙂
I came across a review of She Makes Me Smile by Jonny at http://www.swedishzombie.com. It’s originally written in Swedish, but I translated it with google for your reading purposes. I suppose that makes it my first international review. 😀
So, I’ve been waiting to hear back from a couple conventions regarding possible readings or appearances. I’m really not good with waiting, so there’s been a whole lot of checking my email over and over and over and… well you get the picture.
Some of the wait is finally over. I heard back from two places so far. 🙂
I’ll be doing readings at both conventions. I’m hoping to have something different to read both weekends, just to shake it up a little.
August 31st to September 2nd 2012 – Horrorfind Weekend at the Wyndham Hotel in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania.
Saturday September 1 – 4:00 to 5:00pm
September 20th to 23rd 2012 – Killercon 4 at the Stratosphere Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada.
Sunday September 23 – 11:40am
These are my first official appearances, so f you happen to be in the area, stop by and say hi. Or have a seat in the audience as I stumble through my first live readings 😉
I’ll have chap books for sale and they will include the infamous short story “She Makes Me Smile” and a brand new story called “This Only Happens In The Movies”. The new one is really a novelette but I’ve taken to calling it a novelita (my word for a 10 000 word short story).
The chapbook price will be in the 5$ range.
I have to say I’m pretty stoked about this. I’ll probably stumble through my reading as I stand in front of everyone shaking like a leaf, but it’ll all be worth it in the end.
Hope to see you there!
I haven’t blogged from the treadmill lately since I decided to move my workouts outside. However, today I’m back in the gym/fitness room because I started a running program in the last few days and it’s easier for me to follow the interval training on a treadmill. Supposedly, this 8 week, 3 days a week program will allow me to run 5km at the end of it. That’s not bad specially for someone like me who doesn’t run at all right now. (Unless of course something is chasing me).
I figure running serves a few purposes:
1- Cardio is super important for both for my health in the present but also when the impending zombie apocalypse comes in the near future.
2- Weight loss 🙂 I have to do cardio anyways so I might as well run.
3- It’s something I can’t do and I hate not being able to do something. I figure learning to run is something new and I like newness. I hope at the end of my program to take part in a 5km run and actually finish it. It’s not a lot, but for me who runs not at all right now, it’s a good thing. (I can run, but not well and not for very long. I’m really down and out on my aerobic lung capability… Even with quitting smoking… Oh and I look HORRIBLE when I run right now, but this is why I’m working on that. I’ll get better.)
Also, the treadmill here is not working right, but I’m dealing with it…
Besides running or learning to do so, I’ve been focusing on my other business Idle Hands.ca. (Shameless plug. Haha plug, how fitting…) IdleHands is my home business where I sell masturbation toys / pleasure objects through online shopping and in home parties. It’s a pretty awesome job in itself as I get to make people happy. I’m expanding my product line and will be doing home parties n the Ottawa area in the fall. I think it’s going to be an interesting business year to say the least.
Writing wise, I’m still plugging away at Maple. She’s a great character and I think her first appearance in a story will not be her last one. I’m sitting at 3700 right now and I’m pretty happy at my first attempt at a story genre other than horror. I’m hoping to have it done and submitted by the end of the month, I started it for an anthology and Maple just happened. I’ll be doing more with her in the future so keep an eye out for more Maple.
What else…? Oh stand-up. No, not you, don’t get up from your seat… “You should be a stand up comedian” is one is the most commonly mentioned phrases to me and yes, I want to do stand up. I’ve been jotting down the stories I think I would want to use for an upcoming open mic night somewhere, some future time. Who knows, I might be alright at it. It they don’t laugh I prob will. So I’m gonna do it… Or at least try to.
~ Do or do not… There is no try. ~ Yoda
…and that would be a twenty minute blog post.
You all know I’ve been ranting about my first ever publication coming out for the last little while… “She makes me smile” was picked up by Undead Press (Anthony Giangregorio) to be published in their anthology called Cavalcade of Terror and the book was released May 1st 2012.
I waited… and waited… I was SO excited to see my story and name in print.
One of my friends even went as far as to pay 40$ to Expresspost me a copy of Cavalcade, I waited around two days for the delivery. (Apparently I’m dealing with a buzzer issue here at the house.)
It finally came in and believe me, I didn’t waste any time ripping into the package…
FLIP, FLIP, FLIP… Find the Table of Contents.
…and my heart sank.
Wtf? 😦 There’s a spelling mistake in the title of my story. *(Not from my submission however… They changed it to wrong.)
“She Make’s Me Smile” by Mandy J. De Geit
Well that made me sad, but okay the Mandy part is kinda cool. Let’s see the story itself…
ARGH!!! Same mistake on the title page. Fack, She Make is Me Smile… Really? Oh well… Read on.
… … …
Read read read… WTF? WHO THE HELL? (Run to computer and load up the submitted file with great difficulty, cause your breathing is laboured from a really tight chest, your hands are shaking to the point you can hardly type and you can hardly see the screen cause you’re about to lose your shit waterworks wise… and you NEVER do that…)
Fucking Bastards! They changed my story without telling me.
Let’s see: They turned a non-gendered character into a boy, they named the best friend, they created a memory for the main character about animal abuse. They added a suggestion of rape at the end… I feel like they ruined the suspense in the story. I don’t know what else, I haven’t even read the whole thing through yet because it makes me SOO FREAKING ANGRY!!! *(I’m angry now… just talking about it riles me up. EFFIN GRRRRRR! I could totally kill someone with a paperback, I wonder if that’s been done…) Grrr… I hate anger.
THEY SHOULD’VE ASKED!!!
(I’d have said NO, give me my story back, because you can’t spell and your story makes no sense, but that’s neither here nor there.)
The story didn’t pay anything, not even a contributor’s copy, but still I signed the contract (which said “EDIT” not “revamp”) and let them publish my story. I was rushing on the fact that I was actually going to be a published author.
Let’s not forget the fact that I stayed in contact with the owner of Undead Press throughout the entire time since I was ordering a large quantity of books to sell to my family and friends here in Canada. Never once did he tell me anything about the story being changed. I called friends to make sure that he can do that to the story and found out that he can’t.
I sent him an concise email covering the following points:
1- Why there was a mistake in the title
2- Why my bio was shortened? There were much longer ones (like his own) so it wasn’t for space issues.
3- Why the story was changed?
I told him it wasn’t acceptable and that he should pull the story because it was different from the one I submitted and this was his response. (I haven’t changed anything from the email, I simply cut and pasted and italicized for easier comprehension.)
“wow, i truly cant believe that e,mail. you go girl. this one one hell of a story about dealing with unstable writers
on the contract, it clearly says publisher has the right to EDIT work. you signed it. are you saying you are a dishonest and immoral person and will now try to deny you signed the contract? well i have a copy right here
and as for the story. the editor had a hard time with it, it was very rough and he did alot to make it readable. despite what you think, your writing has a long way to go before its worthy of being printed professionally.
we did what we had to do to make the story printable. you should be thankful, not complaining. ah, the ungrateful writer, gotta love it
the contract also says any disagreements you have about the contract must be filed legally in Massachusetts and when you lose, you must pay all court costs.
so, we are done here. any more correspondences from you must be from your lawyer. i will then send any of those letters to my lawyer and they can hash it out as i dont waste my time arguing with writers over legalities. thats what lawyers are for.
you are so funny. thanks for this email, it truly made my day.”
Wait one fucking dickfaced minute… If my writing has a long way to go before being published professionally… Then you aren’t a professional publisher? Thought so. As for the “publisher has the right to EDIT work”, I know what EDIT means, do you?
Here’s a paragraph copied directly from She Make’s Me Smile in the book.
“Something strange happened then. I recalled a moment when I was a boy. I was playing in my backyard when the dog in my neighbor’s yard escaped through an open gate. My neighbor, an elderly man who lived alone and spoke in a thick accent (I later discovered that is was German), managed to corral the dog back into his yard. I watched, fascinated as the man ripped his long black belt from the loops at his waist and brought it down with a hellish fury upon the dog’s back. The dog slunk down and rested it’s head upon its paws, resigned to its fate. Why didn’t it fight back? Why didn’t it bite the hand of the master?
With the only friend I ever truly had writhing between my legs, I became aroused.”
This was what was in my story.
NOTHING OF THAT IS IN MY ORIGINAL STORY!!! A-D-D-E-D! THIS IS ADD NOT EDIT!!!
*(It’s also shitty writing and I don’t like it in my story… It hurt my face having to retype it here on the blog.)
Shortly after that douchey email from Tony G. I received another one. (I hadn’t even responded to the first one yet.)
here’s something else i am gonna give you cause youre not happy. it should “make you smile” get it?
though the contract says the story is exclusive for 365 days, i am gonna wave that with this email and the story is now NON exclusive.
that means as of now, you are free to resell that story to any market you wish and get it out there again.
His email DID NOT make me smile…
*Fast Forward to Next Day*
I find out that the box of books has been here in Ottawa, Ontario Canada for the last 4 days. Because I don’t have a tracking number, I have no way of knowing this. Only cause Tony FINALLY sent me this…
“Re:update on your books
i double checked the address, too, the one you sent me is the address i made the books out to. see, this is why i dislike international mail.
|2012-05-11||06:19 AM||Address Correction Required via OTTAWA, ON depot|
|2012-05-10||06:32 AM||Address Correction Required via OTTAWA, ON depot|
|2012-05-09||01:45 PM||Address Correction Required via OTTAWA, ON depot|
|2012-05-09||06:27 AM||Address Correction Required via OTTAWA, ON depot|
|2012-05-08||04:49 PM||Address Correction Required via OTTAWA, ON depot|
|2012-05-08||12:30 PM||Address Correction Required via OTTAWA, ON depot|
|2012-05-08||07:58 AM||On vehicle for delivery via OTTAWA, ON depot|
|2012-05-08||05:00 AM||Shipment In Transit via OTTAWA, ON depot|
|2012-05-07||09:43 PM||Left via TORONTO SORT CTR/CTR TRIE, ON depot|
|2012-05-07||09:33 PM||Shipment In Transit via TORONTO SORT CTR/CTR TRIE, ON depot|
|2012-05-07||09:32 PM||Picked up by Purolator via TORONTO SORT CTR/CTR TRIE, ON depot|
|2012-05-07||11:24 AM||Left via DETROIT, MI depot|
(If he had that information, that means there’s a tracking number… FML!)
So he has one, but I don’t… I took a chance anyway and went to fight with Purolator.
Approximately two hours after getting my book… I received this email from Tony G. (I emailed him earlier in the day for the tracking numbers, again… but never mind that, it’s the end part that gets me.)
“here ya go. there are 2 tracking #s. sorry i haven’t gotten back to ya, been busy all morning, not all email at all till right now.
While all this was going on, Vincenzo posted an apology and explanation, I had just agreed to do the interview with Books of the Dead and I thought it would be a good opportunity for Vincenzo Bilof to state his side of the story. Please take a moment to check out the interviews.